Thank you for asking for clarification. the wounds I am referring to here are emotional. They are the internal wounds we received and unconsciously allowed to penetrate our hearts during childhood. Some come as a result of abuse, some are very unintentional but still quite potent and damaging.

It is my unprofessional opinion that when we are wounded emotionally as children, without a sustainable defense to fend off the pain of unkindness, teasing or bullying, for example, we then tend to carry these wounds with us into adulthood, along with the defenses that no longer serve us.

Sometimes, as in my case, the defenses I used in childhood, like hiding for example, no longer work in adulthood. Instead, I compare myself to others to deflect the inadequacies I saw in my inability to protect myself.

When I feel inadequate I find the “comparison machine” a useful tool and it works until I realize that comparing myself to anyone may be one of the greatest forms of self-deprecation.

This may only make sense in my head, yet I know there are many other people, particularly men, who feel unworthy. Some of this may be intellectual until it is connected to the memory of the heart (where the wounds reside) and then it becomes debilitating.

So, for me, self-improvement will always remain a positive influence.

I enjoy your work…it makes me think and feel!

A believer in Lifelong Learning and Collaborative Wisdom, remembering Who I AM through essay, story, and poetry. Listening for narratives that nurture Life.

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